Post by The hornets nest on Nov 18, 2013 3:39:31 GMT
**Trigger: Talk of not trusting new T, no host, and changes in the system**
We are all parts of this mind. We are all parts of this body. That is why we have decided that we are not going to have a host. We are all going to try to take turns throughout the day, being out. It is a good way of healing and helping us with unity. We know that the host is just an alter who is out the most, but we feel like for us, it makes other alters in our system feel less important than 'Leslie.' We don't want anyone to feel like she is better than anyone else.
So, when we go to our new therapist we are considering not telling her who the original is at first so she cannot call any less important. This is a therapist who is supposed to know a little more about dissociation than the one we have now. We do not yet trust her because we haven't met her. Would it be crossing the line to not say which is Leslie? Like, we're wondering if we should give Leslie a new name like Hornet so the T can't tell her that any part is less real or something. We have had too may T's try to do that and we are tired of it. We may be more open with her once we know where she stands, but this is something we are considering. All parts are equal. We will not be treated as fake.
We really have looked back and Logan and Kat have both hosted for a lot of my elementary school years. Leslie/Hornet would come out more at home and for snippets of school. Then Leslie/Hornet took over for middle school and most of high school. We've done a mapping of our lives and it all adds up now.
We really might change her name to Hornet because she feels alienated from us....like, we do treat her differently because she is named Leslie and stuff. We don't mean to, but we naturally feel like she has more ownership to the body since she goes by Leslie. It's weird. We are still thinking it over. and Leslie could be like a default name like Kaleidoscope was talking about because Leslie can be a male or female name. That is what we will do from not on. Then we can all get used to responding to Leslie so normality can be there if needed and nobody will feel less superior to Leslie/Hornet.
So, yeah. Leslie is not the host anymore and her name is Hornet. Our default name is Leslie.
-mix
We are all parts of this mind. We are all parts of this body. That is why we have decided that we are not going to have a host. We are all going to try to take turns throughout the day, being out. It is a good way of healing and helping us with unity. We know that the host is just an alter who is out the most, but we feel like for us, it makes other alters in our system feel less important than 'Leslie.' We don't want anyone to feel like she is better than anyone else.
So, when we go to our new therapist we are considering not telling her who the original is at first so she cannot call any less important. This is a therapist who is supposed to know a little more about dissociation than the one we have now. We do not yet trust her because we haven't met her. Would it be crossing the line to not say which is Leslie? Like, we're wondering if we should give Leslie a new name like Hornet so the T can't tell her that any part is less real or something. We have had too may T's try to do that and we are tired of it. We may be more open with her once we know where she stands, but this is something we are considering. All parts are equal. We will not be treated as fake.
We really have looked back and Logan and Kat have both hosted for a lot of my elementary school years. Leslie/Hornet would come out more at home and for snippets of school. Then Leslie/Hornet took over for middle school and most of high school. We've done a mapping of our lives and it all adds up now.
We really might change her name to Hornet because she feels alienated from us....like, we do treat her differently because she is named Leslie and stuff. We don't mean to, but we naturally feel like she has more ownership to the body since she goes by Leslie. It's weird. We are still thinking it over. and Leslie could be like a default name like Kaleidoscope was talking about because Leslie can be a male or female name. That is what we will do from not on. Then we can all get used to responding to Leslie so normality can be there if needed and nobody will feel less superior to Leslie/Hornet.
So, yeah. Leslie is not the host anymore and her name is Hornet. Our default name is Leslie.
-mix
-Sofelia